I had the opportunity to attend my first Ducks game in Autzen Stadium over the weekend—which is apparently a pretty big deal in the college football world. After the game, one of the freshman players asked me if I’d enjoyed it. I answered in the affirmative because there had been food, conversation, and a festive atmosphere; I did NOT express my general confusion regarding the sport around which (he explained) he had structured his entire academic career. Not that anything unexpected happened during the game—indeed, I suppose it went as well or as poorly as any scrimmage of that sort—only that I have no idea what happened after the first whistle.
Down on the field there was an inflatable, ovuloid macguffin that each team often and violently offered to the other team, but only once the first team (dressed in green) had carried the macguffin to an area marked off with white paint and then taken a moment to punt it between two upright posts. The second team (yellow) busily engaged in trying to accept the macguffin earlier than their rivals were prepared to part with it, which resulted in a good deal of running and yelling and physical contact at speed (it is worth noting that the players were specifically dressed for exactly this activity, being both adequately armored to withstand impact while also sufficiently unencumbered enough to maintain their native agility).
However, the yellow team was apparently none too eager to complete the exchange; frequently, upon forcing the greens to lose control of the macguffin, either by swatting it out of another man’s grip, or preventing its being caught following a long toss, or (most often) by physically grounding the unfortunate porter under a heap of armored bodies) the yellow team would scatter, with much strutting and yelling and exchanging of high-fives, while allowing green time to collect themselves, strategize, and carefully arrange themselves in a line formation. Never once did yellow take the opportunity to immediately seize the coveted oval and take a turn with it; they let green make several attempts at progression towards the white paint before green either kicked the macguffin at the uprights or gave up. In either case, green finished by kicking the macguffin in the opposite direction, thereby effecting an agreed-upon exchange of the thing. Then the whole process was repeated, with the roles reversed.
Curiously, the people in the stands around us (and many of my coworkers too) seemed inordinately and emotionally invested in who had the macguffin or how they comported themselves while possessing it or trying to. Several became very animated and vocal whenever a third set of players (themselves unarmored and wearing white and black clothing) inserted themselves into the ritual exchange, dictating to either the yellow or green teams how and when and where to properly carry or exchange the macguffin. The vocal people became the most so when these black and white individuals took to the field apparently for a reason imperceptible at our distance, which generated much excitement in the stands, as well as an amount of colorful language.
So it was with the utmost candor that I expressed bemused appreciation of the young man’s sport—besides, I got a free t-shirt out of the deal. Good game, indeed!
